Nymphadora they destroy ya

Okay seriously the fifth Harry Potter was good enough to be enjoyable. Wish I didn't have to sit through ten hours to get there but it's true. And I have DEFINITELY found my favorite character, her name's Nymphadora and her hair turns red when she gets angry.

Stupefy Riddikulus

All of my friends that have recommended I see Harry Potter movies are either stupid themselves or think that I am. And of course, no offense to any of you who enjoy them - you obviously have a higher tolerance for lower quality than I do, and I'm sure it serves you well. But I feel like I have to at least try them because all these little Harry Potter fans are growing up and eventually one of them will be elected president, and I should have at least enough cultural knowledge to know that Hogwarts isn't a disease. So I've made it through two films and have started the third, "Harry Potter and the Holy Shit Do I Have To Sit Through Another of These." I've been told this is where they start getting good, and that this one is darker than its predecessors. I can tell, because there is literally more blackness on the screen. This does not make it dark. David Lynch is dark. Lars von Trier is dark. Tim Burton and Harry Potter are not dark. This one begins with the family having dinner with the front door wide open. No mention is made as to why, and in fact there are snow flurries outside. Then Harry inflates his aunt and she floats... out the door of course because it's wide open. Are you FUCKING kidding me. This is presented to me as good writing, something I would enjoy? The only thing I'm hanging on to is the overall story of Voldemort, and to find out which one of them's gonna get to fuck the little girl with the furry eyebrows. Plus I'm kind of hoping Harry dies at the end, that could be rewarding. But if that evil little blonde kid Malfoy turns out to be secretly hurting inside because his father never wanted to play catch, and eventually turns good because Harry shows him mercy, I'm going to throw all of these dvd's into the trash. After I snap them in half first.