Sunday, August 25, 2013
Where's that confounded grail
Just watched the movie “Excalibur.” I don't understand the whole King Arthur searching for the Grail thing. I mean it was only the Dark Ages – how could they already have lost it so completely? And why would you look for it by riding on horseback through the woods of England waiting for a hallucination? Wouldn't you think a better place to start would be, I don't know, Jerusalem? Take a walk downtown and ask people “Hey, you remember Jesus' favorite cup? Whatever happened to it? Have you seen it lately?” Or here's an idea, go to Jesus' house and look in his cabinets. I would think some good, solid, Jesus-built cabinets should still be standing at that point. If he's anything like me, check next to the fridge, that's where I keep my cups.
Thursday, August 22, 2013
It's All Just a Game: Tropico 4
Hi. I'm Larry, and I'm a military dictator on a small third-world island in the Caribbean.
Go ahead, have a seat on this nice bench with your back to the friendly neighborhood guard tower. We like it that way.
I was given a quest to arrest the person who had the least amount of respect for me. So I break out the ledger and look through the numbers and it turns out that honor goes to my opponent in the upcoming election. Well, how perfect is that, so I go ahead and give the order to have her brought in to camp for a little re-educating. Definitely not something I want to miss, so I search the streets to find her - turns out she's a little old pregnant lady, hobbling slowly down the sidewalk. Easiest arrest yet, although it does take a while for her to walk to jail.
I sentence her to five years, and I assume at some point she has the baby in there but I don't ever go back to check on her. Actually I'm a bit surprised to find my first prisoner still languishing in his cell - I arrested him just to see how it was done. His crime was thinking about supporting my opponent in the last election. Funny thing is, if I ever do let him out he'll be an ex-con and no longer eligible to vote! So I guess the lesson here is, Vote for Larry.
Go ahead, have a seat on this nice bench with your back to the friendly neighborhood guard tower. We like it that way.
I was given a quest to arrest the person who had the least amount of respect for me. So I break out the ledger and look through the numbers and it turns out that honor goes to my opponent in the upcoming election. Well, how perfect is that, so I go ahead and give the order to have her brought in to camp for a little re-educating. Definitely not something I want to miss, so I search the streets to find her - turns out she's a little old pregnant lady, hobbling slowly down the sidewalk. Easiest arrest yet, although it does take a while for her to walk to jail.
I sentence her to five years, and I assume at some point she has the baby in there but I don't ever go back to check on her. Actually I'm a bit surprised to find my first prisoner still languishing in his cell - I arrested him just to see how it was done. His crime was thinking about supporting my opponent in the last election. Funny thing is, if I ever do let him out he'll be an ex-con and no longer eligible to vote! So I guess the lesson here is, Vote for Larry.
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